Sunday, November 23, 2003

Week 4

So I guess the Willingham honeymoon, along with the
Michigan spaghetti, just hit the dining room wall,

16 – Minutes more that Georgia Tech held the ball than
Florida State in the first half of their game. Though
keep in mind…
8 - Minutes more Hawaii held than ball than SC in the
first half, which ended with SC up 31-6.
2 – Yardline Georgia Tech had a first and goal during
that first half.
4 – Consecutive plays FSU stuffed GT’s when GT skipped
the field goal.
1 – Final margin of FSU victory, 14-13.
2 – More lifetime victories for Joe Paterno (337) than
Bobby Bowden.
4 - Likely wins remaining for PSU this year: Kent
State (are they back to “Kent State” now?), Minnesota,
Northwestern, Indiana.
2 – Toss ups: Michigan State, Purdue.
3 - Likely losses: Wisconsin, Ohio State, at Iowa -
what’s that? 5-4?
1 – Easy wins remaining for Bowden (Duke).
4 – Better, but not much, than 50-50 to win: Colorado,
Virginia, Wake, Clemson.
4 – Tough games: Miami, At Notre Dame, NC State, Fla -
What’s that sound like? 6 wins? 2 tough ones, 3
50-50s and Duke? Let’s say 6.
1 – Likely lead for Paterno if you like my power of
prediction – and we know how good I am at prediction.
2: Losses in row for Colorado, at home, to the Pac 10.
This stat is only here to point out that CU-WSU this
weekend was a QB duel between Klatt and Kegel.
101: Years since Michigan shutout Notre Dame.
1: Passing yards for Notre Dame in the first half.
35: Michigan yardline Notre Dame never crossed.
111,726: “attendence” at Michigan-ND, an “NCAA
record.” Please. PLEASE. Someone stop the nonsense.
Stop reporting it, stop repeating it, stop allowing
it. Anytime Michigan or Tennessee is on ABC, the
school suddenly manages to squeeze 10 more yahoos into
the stadium than they “ever did before” and its an
“NCAA record.” Shows us the seats that were empty
last time. It’s fiction.
4 – in people, the total increase Michigan claimed to
have accurately recorded in crowd size between the
1999 and 2001 Ohio State games.
.0039 – claimed percentage change in that crowd, an
accuracy in measurement equivelent to counting, one by
one, every hair on your head, then ccounting the next
day and finding 4 more. Only instead of counting your
hairs by hand, you’re counting them through 100 or so
turnstiles run by minimum-wagers in yellow jackets who
couldn’t care about as much about the hairs on your
head as they do how many mokes show up for Ohio State.
151 – total by which the ‘new record’ surpasses that
2001 game (.13 percent change, or less than a quarter
inch of one sideburn).
4,000 – in people, minimum by which “record crowds” at
Michigan AND Tennessee exceed their stadium’s
0 – Explainations at either school’s website on how
this could be.
I’m so pissed off about this attendece thing, I’m
not going to be able to address the NEW Game of the
Year, Ohio State-NC State. Except to say:
2 – QB sneaks NC State attempted from the 5 then the 3
in triple OT which OSU easily stuffed. OSU hadn’t
stopped their passing game since halftime, and their
RB Terrance McClenden, was, as Donnie put it to open
the Big Lebowski “throwing rocks” with OSU’s D-line.
3: Games Of The Year so far, in week 3 of the Index.
0: Touchdowns scored in NINE GAMES against the
starting defenses of Georgia. USC and Michigan, each
with one stiff game among them. This weekend, SC was
up 52-6 on Hawaii when Carroll emptied the bench at
the end of the third and Georgia pitched a shut out
against no less than Lou Holtz until the closing
garbage minutes.
2: Games out of 3 that Florida has scored 60 points.
And they scored 30 in just over a half against Miami.
Tennessee at Fla next week – we’ll see.

Anyone care to play Rank’em?

1 – Michigan. A flawless team that beat Notre Dame
1a – Oklahoma. A flawless team that didn’t beat Notre
Dame 38-0.
3 – Georgia. A flawless team that peed its pants in
last year’s key Florida game.
4 – USC. Running game, check. Mike Williams and
others, check. Snap for snap, best defense in the
country, check-plus. But still no way to tell about
5 – Ohio State – Was #1 prior to SDSU game. As soon
as they win a road game, they can be #1 again. But
they only play 3, so screw them.
5 – Miami. They came back 30+ on Florida. But then,
they were DOWN 30+ to Florida.

not as good as last week, but then again, with
blowouts everywhere, neither was the week.

next week: Florida-Tennesse, or The "which scowling
white-guy coach finds burning crosses on his lawn when
he gets home" Bowl.

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