Thursday, February 05, 2009

N is for the Natchitoches Travelin' Pants-Shittin' Show!

Or, THE WORST F'IN FOOTBALL GAME EVER PLAYED
and Neil Diamond, besides


College Football is a recurring national Revival of local carnival barkers, traveling freak wagons and whistle-stop circus shows that thrill us and move on.

Some of what we see is Great and lingers in legend. Much is, as it must be, average, and some is dull and stagnant.

But occasionally one of College Football's circuses careens from "Thrilling" to "Grotesque."

This is such a time.

Specifically, this is the 3rd quarter performance of the Northwestern State (La.) Demons in their 2004 game at Nicholls State. Or, in honor of NWSU's deep-bayou hometown, the Index presents:

The Natchitoches Travelin' Pants-Shittin' Show

Thanks to
Y2Hood, a Nicholls State student who preserved these staggering four clips of football sorriness. Like a lost recording of Enrico Caruso or the Zapruder film, the tape is grainy and static-filled, but its power to mesmerize is full 1080p.

The game itself was at Nicholls State, which is in Thibodaux, La. a crossroads town best imagined as the bullseye-center of the hurricane-buffer bayou southwest of New Orleans, whose main industries are heat, flies and shrimp-boat solvent.

Natchitoc
hes, home to NWSU, sits far to the north in the state's rainforest interior, just east of the better-known Texas city of Nacodoches, with which it shares two traits: each town claims to be the oldest in their respective state, and both bear names rooted in grand Creole defiance of spoken English.

Though spelled nearly alike, Nacodoches is pronounced, roughly, "Nac-ah-DOE-shus" vs. Natchitoches, which is"NACK-ah-tush."

Little was at stake that night in Thibodaux, as both teams headed towards .500ish seasons, with Nicholls the favorite, and ahead 17-14 at the half. But in the middle of the third, the Demons offense came to the line on the Nichols 37.

And from the nearby canvas tent erected before the game, a gospel piano began to peel into the Louisianna night.....




Thhhhhhhhiiiiiii-Bodaux night,
with the Demons in town
and the grass on the ground smellin'
.... sweet...

Mooooove up the road
to the Stadium's gate
c'est chez Nicholls State
gettin'..... beat...

Sits a ragged team
Backed up to its goal.
And now its third-down,
With sixty-one to go!




Its Natch- rhymes with "whack"! - the Natchitoches Travelin' Pants-Shittin' Show!
(Halleja! Halleja!)
Pack up the babies
and give up a safety!
and drop easy throws!
Even wideouts are slow
In "Nack-a-tush's" Show.

Paaaassss..... on first down
and the ball's on a rope
he's alone as the Pope-
...incomplete...

Mooooovvveee.... on the line
and you do it two times
and they walk off the Dime
....gettin'... deep

Then the snap goes high!
From a shotgun call!
Why not give a boot
Hey, it's called 'football'!!

Its Natch - take the sack - the Natchitoches Travelin' Pants-Shittin' Show!
(Halleja! Halleja!)
Pack up the babies!
and give up a safety!
and drop easy throws!
Even wideouts are slow
In Natchitoches' Show!

(Hallelujah!)

(Halle, Halle-lujah!)

Corners!
(Hallelujah!)
I said, Corners!
(Halle, Halle-lujah!)
Now you got yourself two good hands!
(Hallelujah!)
Now when the bawl is underthrown you gots to reach out yo' one hand for it, cuz that's what it's thah fo'!
(Halle, Halle-lujah!)
And when yo' heart is troubled, you gots to tip that ball to the opposing reciever in fullstride and then knock over your teammate and both tumble to the ground for an easy TD, cuz that's what he's thah fo'!


(Hallelujah!)


Take this I-N-T
One of three this day!
Get knocked da F-out!
We still won't make the play!



Its Natch- take the sack - the Natchitoches Travelin' Pants-Shittin' Show!
(Halleja! Halleja!)
Pack up the babies!
and give up a safety!
and drop easy throws!
Even wideouts are slow
In Natchitoches' Show!


Bonus Clip: First Play of the 4th Quarter. THe Bayou Magic rolls along.

Do you dare to look away from nature's Cruelest Trick!






This took a while. Might need a day off for 'O'

19 comments:

Pooh Bear said...

Wow I just found this. The reason the video was so grainy is in 2004 digital TV had not yet hit the Houma/Thibodaux area and this was commonplace for Fox Sports at that time.

These videos only made it into my youtube account because I was practicing VHS to DVD to Digital transfers and it worked and since we'd recently won conference during this project, I posted these to my youtube account.

I wish I could have provided better quality video but you'd have to take that up with 2004 era Time Warner cable.

-Y2Hood

Unknown said...

Hello. I am professional writer at essayontime.com.au . And I'm happy to help you write essay.

Hag said...

Use this link papersgram.com and get 15% discount on any papers!

Anonymous said...

excellent post, very informative. I wonder why the other experts of this
sector do not notice this. You must continue your writing.
I'm confident, you've a great readers' base already!

Anonymous said...

It is not my first time to go to see this web page, i am visiting
this web site dailly and obtain pleasant information from
here everyday.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't refrain from commenting. Very well written!

Anonymous said...

Asking questions are actually pleasant thing if you are not
understanding anything totally, except this piece of writing presents pleasant understanding yet.

Anonymous said...

What's Going down i'm new to this, I stumbled upon this I've found It absolutely useful and it has aided me out
loads. I hope to give a contribution & aid other users like its helped me.
Great job.

Anonymous said...

Excellent website. Lots of useful information here. I am sending it to several pals ans additionally sharing in delicious.
And certainly, thank you for your effort!

Anonymous said...

Wow, this piece of writing is nice, my younger sister is analyzing these kinds
of things, so I am going to let know her.

Alex Bred said...

Thanks for sharing. From your article I have learned many important thing also these videos are very much helpful. I just research more about and found sources visit to get more. It may help all.

Anonymous said...

XXX Grownup Movies
XNXX delivers cost-free intercourse motion pictures аnd quick free
porn videos (tube porn). 7. For individuals tһat mіght ԝant to vіew solme grownup xxx Televisiln oon tһe web demonstrates аnd films, tһе Television softwaree οffers cοmplete
privacy tօ dο so. Given tһat tһе software iѕ downloaded to yоur own private
pc, no one ⅽan access іt witһout youг permissions.

In additіon yoou will Ьe ready to watch it bеhind ϲlosed doors
іn үour residence office becaսse iit will not interferee ԝith еverybody elsе's Tv
viewing on tһe family members Television.

Anyway, on myy visits I hаve talked tօ severall of the families we assists young Filipina ladies
аnd tһeir buddies hat һave ѡorked in cyber sex.
Тһe 1 Ƅelieve they all know іs what tһey cwll "Turkey Guy" ⲟr "Mr.FreeShow" They ѕay
thɑt the new cyber ladijes learn quicкly to monitor the IP addresses off tһe consumers аnd not respond oor bann
from theіr website thⲟse IP addresses that ϲome from ɑll Arab Countries.
Mоst cyber studios һave a list оf IPs from tһat area.


Any person addicted to this evil - pornography - willl սndoubtedly attest ɑnd declare tһat the reward for
this selfish ɑnd addictive aсt is anythng at aⅼl but ‘freedom.' Τhe reality
is that ideas tᥙrn out tο bе corrupted, comnitments and responsibilities discarded, crime committed, addictions designed, ɑnd
selfish lusts beϲome a lot mоre critical than self-manage.
Pornography іs an market that can mɑke a handful of wealthy att tһe expense of destroying lives, tearing аpaгt
marrages and families , and primarily weakening the qᥙite basis
оf our society.

Talking dirty in bed is not aⅼl about blurting out the all the filthhy phrases you
ⅽɑn believe of. You and yoսr guy require t᧐ bе relaxed at νery fіrst,
annd asss free witһ eѵery other as you сan get. I would advocate thyat
you find a professionally ᴡritten guie thаt ԝill
ɑct aѕ yоur personalized trainer fгom
tһe origtinal stagers of finmding ᧐ut to talk dirty
to the level yoս best dirty talking aѕ a way to improve уour sex existence.
Тheгe aare lotѕ of them out tһere but the ideal іs 1 that ѕtarts fr᧐m the fundamentals and comes with a whole lot a lot morre examples oof
sexual expressions, dirty speak terms, sex slang, synonyms,
quotes ɑnd vulgar speech Ьetween оther people.


Οnce telephone numƅers have beeen exchanged, the up coming day YОU conttact hеr One particular time.
Let mе repeat thɑt for you. YOU Geet in touch wih НER ΟNLY One TIME.
Her machine did record tthe message, ʏоu did not forget tⲟ saү ѕomething, аnd she does have
caller IⅮ. If ѕhe doesn't get iin touch with
yoᥙ bɑck that dɑy wait 2 mor days prior to callling back One pɑrticular Μuch more TӀMᎬ.
If no response аgain then DΟ NOΤ Pone НER Agaіn!!!
Wait too meet her inn particulaг person again. Message must be sweet and tо tthe level …hey I ѡas considering
dinner and ɑ movie Ϝriday or Satᥙrday, ѡould enjmoy fߋr you to be my
datе, let me know if you caan match me іnto yoսr schedule,
mʏ quantity іs xxx-xxxx…” that is all you redquire to saу.


Ꮢeally tһіs is tһe worst predicament eᴠеr but most women prevail in tһeѕe
cases striϲtly based mߋstly on hⲟѡ and ԝho handles tһеm.
Iwould like үou to fijd out oor I cann hоw yοur statе handles rape depositions, filings
ɑnd testimony. In many states nowadays you are allowed
to ԁo yoyr testimony andd cross examination annd ɑll depositions bү video and you
may never eveг have to encounter your rapist or testify in open court.
You can peгhaps locate tһіѕ on RAINN oor рossibly սnder rape
testimony іn your states laws οn-line or by
going onto a free lergal aid site inn your statе.

Anonymous said...

Post writing is also a excitement, if you be familiar with afterward you can write or else it is complicated
to write.

Anonymous said...

What i do not realize is in fact how you are not actually a lot more smartly-preferred
than you may be right now. You're very intelligent. You recognize therefore significantly relating to this topic, made me individually consider it from
numerous various angles. Its like women and men are not interested unless it's one thing to accomplish with Woman gaga!
Your own stuffs great. All the time handle it up!

Anonymous said...

My spouse and I stumbled over here by a different page
and thought I may as well check things out. I like what I see so now i'm following you.
Look forward to looking into your web page again.

Anonymous said...

My spouse and I stumbled over here by a
different page and thought I may as well check
things out. I like what I see so now i'm following you.
Look forward to looking into your web page again.

Anonymous said...

You're so cool! I do not think I have read anything like that
before. So great to find somebody with unique thoughts on this topic.
Seriously.. many thanks for starting this
up. This site is one thing that is needed on the web, someone with a
little originality!

Anonymous said...

magnificent submit, very informative. I wonder why the opposite experts of this sector do not
realize this. You must continue your writing. I'm sure, you
have a huge readers' base already!

Graduateway said...

animal testing https://essayscollector.com/examples/animal-testing-argumentative-essay/

This article originally appeared on i-D UK.

As a teenager living in New York, my ideal boyfriend would be fully formed: 6'2", perfect skin and bones, creative, talented, and respected by his peers. My daughter Ava — who is 18 now, loves to wear skimpy clothes, listen to pop, and do anything that...